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A REPORT FROM THE PHANTOM ZONE

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A REPORT FROM THE PHANTOM ZONE

By Steve Aishman

So I was giving a talk other day and when I was done, I heard someone in the audience say under their breath:

“That’s not the way a real artist talks …”

So here are some of the ways real artists talk about their work. Enjoy and feel free to steal the lines or add more in the comments section:


“My work primarily deals with beauty.”
“I love color.”
“My artwork defies categorization.”
“I was born to be a painter. I can’t conceive of doing anything.”
“Most of the imagery in my work comes to me in my dreams.”
“For me, art is all about mark making.”
“I pursue the authentic. The real. The truth.”
“My work is heavily influenced by hip hop and jazz, but mostly street culture.”
“Passion always informs my work.”
“My current work is an exploration of how form is determined by, and conversely determines, space.”
“I just love light.”
“Painting is such a display of vulnerability; the more I paint the more I feel exposed.”
“The turmoil of my inner psychology manifests itself through my art.”
“My work references the figure/ground relationship.”
“I’m really interested in seeing.”
“My work reflects the values of the small town I grew up in.”
“When I first started painting, I looked and saw that along with the paint, my soul had appeared on the canvas.”
“My art is all about working with materials.”
“I like the simplicity of form and color.”
“My work is really visual poetry and metaphor.”
“I think artists are born and not made.”
“My drawings are about the quality of line and form.”
“It's what happens in the negative space that fascinates me.”
“I feel that I always gravitate toward organic shapes.”
“My work celebrates our human condition.”
“I seek to blur the line between the artist and the art work.”
“People have said of my work that it is the "inside out, rather than the outside in".”
“I’m fascinated by consumerism.”
“My art practice is filled with complexity.”
“The job of the contemporary artists is to contextualize technological and philosophical shifts.”
“I have absolutely no interest whatsoever in conceptual art. It means nothing to me.”
“My work resonates with the nostalgia of my youth.”
“In textbook terms, my work would best be described as Post-Neo-expressionism.”
“I try to find poetry in banality.”
“The influence of Van Gogh in my work is both apparent and deliberate.”
“My art is about the attempt to immortalize a moment.”
“My work is all about process.”
“The hand of the artist is apparent in everything I make.”
“My art practice is really is an exploration of the subconscious.”
“If I had to label my paintings I’d rather label them as Realist.”
“My work oscillates between the tangible and the intangible.”
“My paintings are about paint on canvas.”
“My work speaks for itself.”

If you'd like some more phrases to talk about art in a way that is more like the art speak that is taught at graduate school, try: The Instant Art Critique Phrase Generator

Please feel free to add your own lines in the comment section below.


About Author

Steve Aishman is a former resident of the Phantom Zone. Since his escape he has been a regular contributor Big RED & Shiny.

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